MELATONIN-T: RED EYES THE MORNING

I've been having trouble sleeping these past few days. i am insomniac. huhuhu... i have lots of pressure stimuli around me, and i am thinking that it is just me who's creating trouble out of those. It is suppose to push me to do things better and to plan ahead for my own good. My family problems, my financial independence, my social life, and the forgotten one, my stage of intimacy which i don't give a damn. I was really on it when i was in college days, but mention it in front of me right now, I'll just give you pretty faces around the net and some "cyber-friends". It is unlikely.

I cant describe how i felt the morning i had my eyes red. It was not conjunctivitis or anything, i mean the bacterial or viral one but i guess my eyes was just "overused", same as my bed. I had different relaxation ways done and they haven't help me well. I have been controlling my naps during day time and i even omitted the caffeine containing foods, it just dont work for me.

I took a capsule of my melatonin-T, it made me dizzy 30 minutes after. Supposedly, it should've drop me to bed and had me my REM after hours but it just made me dizzy and nauseated. ( sigh)... i guess i am just having so much of things on me and on my mind. Thinking about the problems that i am not suppose to give time.

How about you? Have ever experienced this kind of problem? i mean, a moment when you just can't bear the things around you because you knew their is really something wrong with you, the place where you at, the people around you and to add up the feeling of trying to be on your own ?

mmm... Maybe it is too early to think about it, but one thing i know for sure , this can be the start of something different. Something good.

seasons change : a thai movie without english subtitle

2008 when i was browsing on my page in crunchy and saw this movie. its all about a boy who found enthusiasm in music out of romantic love. his father wanted him to become a doctor. He lied and enrolled in a school of music just to follow the girl he loves.

i never thought my heart has desires for drum beats and classical music.

i downloaded this movie and found no subtitle. i had my streaming sessions for about 4 times for this movie, the time when crunchy has still open walls to show their movies for free. Unluckily, you cannot watch this on their web page anymore, the video has been deleted. i'm looking forward to meet someone who has the copy with hardcoded subtitles.

PRACTICALITY COMES IN DIFFERENT WAYS

SHOUT!

NARCOTICS DURING HOLIDAYS

--i feel like i'm loosing you, but ... i just realized i never had you from the start--

It was just my all in my mind. My own fantasy. The hatred and bitterness come crossing my nerves, making me numb the more. It wasnt right from the start that i kept everythin from you. The words you have said and the laughters you've whispered during pillow times. It was all good as i can just remember it. BUZZ! no answer. i did not took the chance to answer your call, it was not right to do so. The point of having you is not just to fill my fantasy of love, it was just dominating and irresistible to compare something vast to a feeling within a grasp. I am giving myself more than you think i do. i am
Stupified.

Vacío Por Medio Día

Llame o texto que estaba a la espera de casi la mitad de un día que no ha respondido a unas 12 horas. Cuento con cada hora, cada momento pasado sin él en mi bandeja de entrada o llame al registrado navegador.Yo sé! Esto no es bueno para más de 6 años mi corazón descansado. Qué puedo hacer mi cerebro me dice que colgar a mi adormecida todavía me empujó a cal.Mientras estaba escribiendo este sigo expectante un mensaje que podría hacer mi cara brillará aún ninguno. Su 9:05 pm voy a ir a la cama 11 mensajes de texto! Mi teléfono recibido aún ninguna de estas se. Royden y mantiene sobre el envío de mensajes tal vez perdidas sus compañeros de clase y SERVIEN, haciendo un esfuerzo para que me haga saber que está feliz por esta fiesta. Estoy bien bien y seré mejor barra de Gracias por los mensajes.Se analgesia que por lo menos no fue mi bandeja de entrada vacía, mientras que yo estaba esperando a alguien impulsar su teclado para llegar a mí. Estoy sangrando por la buena Rus Sí es muy efectiva yo estaba sangrando. TT

EMPTY FOR HALF A DAY

call or text, i was waiting for almost half of a day . he havent responded for about 12 hours. i count every hour, every single moment spent without him on my inbox or call registered browser. i know! this is not good, for over 6 years, my heart rested. what can i do? my brain's telling me to droop, to be numb, yet my inconsistent self pushed me to call and text. while i was writing this, i am still expectant that a message could make my face glow, still none. its 9:05 pm, i am about to go to bed, 11 text messages ! my phone received, yet none of those was his. and royden keeps on sending messages, maybe he missed his classmates and servien, making an effort to let me know he is happy for this holiday. i am good, good and i'll be better royd. thanks for the messages. it was an analgesia that at least my inbox wasnt that empty while i was waiting for somebody to at push his keypad to reach me. i am bleeding for good. yes rus, its very effective, i was bleedin'.

just for this time. hehehe